Beyond the Event: A Youth Ministry Podcast
Bringing together influential voices from the CIY community to walk alongside you in your journey to maintain momentum between the mountaintop experiences of youth ministry.
Beyond the Event: A Youth Ministry Podcast
BTE4.05 Scaling for Growth: Time and Resources with DJ Rodeffer and Mallory Jenkins
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On this episode of Beyond the Event, we sit down with DJ Rodeffer, a student pastor from Frederick, Maryland. DJ walks us through the trials and triumphs of evolving from leading a small group to managing the growing congregation at Collective Church. His insights shed light on the dynamic roles within youth ministry and the art of fostering a community that feels both expansive and intimate. By sharing personal experiences, DJ offers listeners a glimpse into his journey of spiritual leadership and community building.
Our conversation takes a deep dive into the strategic planning and collaboration necessary for youth ministry events, specifically a four-day experience centered on the book of Hebrews. With a thematic focus on endurance and faith, we discuss how these teachings are tailored to resonate with both junior high and high school students, drawing them closer to the gospel.
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Hi, I'm Brad Warren. This is Beyond the Event, a youth ministry podcast presented by Christ in Youth, where we help you maintain momentum between the mountaintops. So pumped for today to talk a little bit more about growth and how to grow well with a good friend of mine. His name is DJ Rodefer. He is a student pastor in Frederick, maryland, at a church plant called Collective Church, and I'm excited to have a conversation with him about the ways that his life and role have changed as his youth ministry has grown from a very, very small, tight group of people to something that requires a little bit more intentionality and management as it's, as it's grown. Uh, but we will get to that, we'll get to that. We'll get to that when we get to it first. We get to it first. I get to talk to mal. Hey brad, hey mal. How the heck are you? I'm good, good, good, good, good. I'm glad to hear that we're getting a late start today, mal.
Speaker 2Okay, you said you weren't.
Speaker 1Okay, we won't.
Speaker 2No.
Speaker 1Well now? Well, no, we can leave the people in mystery. No, you won't, okay. No, I will, we get my.
Speaker 2No, I overslept, Yesterday was Halloween. Okay, we had a lot of fun. So much fun. Scare, no share, not scare. Yes, I'm dyslexic, brad.
Speaker 1I'm not dyslexic and I say scare not share all the time it's so hard to get it right. It just feels more natural.
Speaker 5I'll say it and if Jennifer listens to this podcast, it's okay okay, whoever I feel, like Jennifer is the one that would correct me but it just feels. More's to say, I feel like Jennifer is the one that would correct me.
Speaker 2We got to go straight to the top, maybe, but it just feels more natural to say scare, not share. Yes, so we put on. Do the people know?
Speaker 4Do the people know? Maybe we put it on social media? Yeah, we do. Okay, it's like yeah.
Speaker 2Yeah, competition in our hallways. I'm in the west wing, we are three-time champions of this competition, um, where our different hallways have a good old you know competition. Competition where you, the staff, kids and you know community of of fun, fun children, uh, they come around and they trick-or-treat through our hallways and so we have different themes and it has become over the few years, a competition of you know hallways against each other, of like and as on, as we're prone to do.
Speaker 2Yes, the competition has become intense yes, when I started in 2016, it was a bowl of candy on a stool outside of your office and it was like, and the kids would come by and you go, oh cute you're a princess pre peach.
Speaker 2Okay, yeah, on to the next thing. On to the next thing. And now it has gotten a little out of insane, because I think we were, we, we are, you know, three-time champions. And so the garage, which is the northwest wing, but it used to be our old garage. They wanted the trophy so bad that they started working on it I'm gonna be honest.
Speaker 1They deserved it last year. They did not. They deserved it last year and they got robbed they? They didn't. And this year it was a little bit of a makeup call and the garage won. They did not. All of that to say I feel like we're vamping a lot about how you're late.
Speaker 2Okay, I worked really hard on that. And then I stayed up really late working hard on a Halloween party tonight and then, yeah, I was working on my costume for tonight.
Speaker 1Yes, right now it is november 1st but it's a friday, okay, yeah, yeah, no, totally understandable, my dogs are gonna be aladdin and abu are you the magic carpet? No, I am genie.
Speaker 2I am genie okay and so I was working on halloween costumes, stayed up late and then are you gonna be singing for us? Um no, but I'm a specific part of genie where you know he's the cheerleader and he's cheering on aladdin. He's like. He's like rick and rock and rock, a rake, stick that sword into that snake, and then javar is like stay out of it, because he's yeah, yeah and then he's like javar javar, he's our man.
Speaker 2If he can't do it, great. So that's me. And then they're a boo and laughing um so I stayed up way too late, and then I overslept. And then I texted brad 20 minutes before and I said bad news, it's filmed now, so I could have left my office, I mean my bed. I could have officed from my bed with a Zoom link, which could have happened.
Speaker 1But we're on YouTube now.
Speaker 2Yeah, which is tough, so qualm, so I could have just done this from my bed.
Speaker 1Oh, that's all right and that is an intro Mal, I want to tell you, let's talk about Mix.
Speaker 1Let's do it, I want to tell you that Mix last year was spectacular. I loved it. Every youth pastor that I talked to loved it. I think it was a timely message for students, for youth pastors, for me and other members of our staff, and it was just really wonderful for youth pastors, for me and other members of our staff, and it was just really wonderful. I'm excited to see now what we come up with for 2025. Me too. So, with you being our lead programmer for Mix, I wanted to have you come on and talk a little bit about what we have to look forward to next summer.
Speaker 2Yes, well, our poster is just unreal.
Speaker 1It's so cool, it's so good I mean, you can see all of that online already. Yes, you can see how icom slash mix. It's all there it's so good.
Speaker 2I mean, matthew harris is just genius incredible and he's really the reason that the garage won, I mean yeah he's just sure not scare don't mention the wound if you went to mix this year. You understand, okay, anyway, um, and so, yeah, he is just so incredible, and so he. He made our poster last year for rest of your life. Um, we have so many talented designers.
Speaker 2I mean we have Tatiana, who made our amazing mascots. She makes our mascots, so she's working on them this year too, but Matthew just happened to make our poster last year and he made our poster this year as well, and so we are in this outer space world and typically our outer realm doesn't necessarily match our indoor, so it's kind of outside it's a ton little thing.
Speaker 2Yeah, it's a ton little thing and it's like, oh, like in 23, it was Western and then it was Western but inside was Doodle and it's like why? And it's like it doesn't need to have a reason.
Speaker 1Yeah, we're mixed baby.
Speaker 2Yeah, we're mixed baby.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 2We're middle school, junior high.
Speaker 1Keeping it fast and loose.
Youth Ministry Program Planning and Collaboration
Speaker 2Oh yeah, that is junior high. Yeah, we don't need a reason, and it's so fun because their brains and our brains are just like fun, and so we like to change it up. But this year it's the first time where they will align. So we are in this outer space world indoor and out, and so they are space cadets that are, you know, going through training for their outer space mission in the outer realm. But also we are in this amazing outer space look and feel, because our tour theme is in between and we're going um through the book of hebrews, but obviously we're only a four-day event. So you kind of have to pick and choose.
Speaker 2When you go through hitting the highlights, you're hitting the highlights, um, but Hebrews is just such an interesting book and the the author of it of course we don't know who, but, um, the, the author of it is just so compelling when they're talking about this amazing sacrifice of Jesus and encouraging us to keep the faith. And what was very compelling for me in studying the text was and I love that here on the programming team, like Mikey, myself and Nate, we get to kind of dive in and we collaborate together. But then we also want mix and move to feel different. We want the teachings also to align and that's why sometimes you're going to hear, if you go to a mix and move in the same summer you're going to hear some of the same stories or teachings.
Speaker 1So last year you but it's so age intentional which is like the beautiful thing exactly is you can't. Even if you take the same four verses out of hebrews chapter two and you want to teach into a junior high audience, you're just going to present it differently than if you teach it to a high school audience, which is what I think is so magical about move heard the core verses of um matthew 11, 28, 28 30, yeah 28 through 30 and um psalms 23 last year at both events.
Speaker 2But all of our jesus stories were actually very different. We at mix did not do the calming of the storm. We did not do mary and martha, because we had already done that the year before. So like that's the fun thing about like they are two different um experiences because one it's a different age, intentional um expression, but also we are two different programmers, like mikey and myself. We're two different people and, uh, god is speaking to us in different ways, and so it's really cool how we're able to collaborate but also be individuals as we look at these students and pray and see how the Lord wants us to really teach and lead as we go out throughout the summer. So what really stood out to me in reading Hebrews was Hebrews 7, 25, where it says it's on our poster and saying like Jesus lives forever to intercede with God on our behalf, and so that's really this meaning of in between is that you know the heart of the gospel is that you know we let sin come in between us and God, and then Jesus is what changed everything.
Speaker 2And so would we learn this week at Mix? Would we take those four days and learn about? Get mixed, where we take those four days and learn about, you know, the gospel and use Hebrews to kind of walk us through creation, fall, redemption and kingdom work and this hall of faith in Hebrews 11 on day four, and how there's so many kingdom workers of the past, there's so many of them that we turn to and we hear about. And then also this amazing in chapter 12, this amazing like just encouragement of endurance, of like keep the faith run with endurance. And so we're really excited to kind of dig in there and say, yeah, students, let's look and see how this letter was written for these church goers, these followers, to say, hey, jesus comes in and he is the way, he's the one that gets us back to God.
Speaker 2And so our daily themes are in between night one. Let's talk about this in between. What does it mean? What's this interceder like? What does god have to do or jesus need to? Why did we need jesus? And then, um, it would kind of flow from there like god and us, death and life, now and forever. So what's the in between of god and us, death and life, now and forever? Um, because they are the in-between of God and us death and life, now and forever. Because they are in this middle position, they're in in-between, they're middle schoolers.
Speaker 1They are Literally middle. You're in the middle. Yes, they are in between their adolescence.
Speaker 2They're still in it, but they're like in their adolescence and adulthood the rest of their life. Throwback to last year is ahead of them, but they're kind of stuck in the middle.
Speaker 1Sometimes people don't know what to do with them yeah, and it's like I don't feel like a child, but I'm not an adult. Yeah, it's like, yeah, there's a lot there yeah, so read that read, read your theme verse again.
Speaker 2Yeah, so it's Hebrews 7.25,. Jesus lives forever to intercede with God on our behalf.
Speaker 1So why do you think I'm going to ask you a hard question? Yeah. You ready? Why do you think that that verse is like uniquely going to speak to, or how do you think that verse is uniquely going to speak to junior high students this summer?
Speaker 2I think because students have always wanted someone to be there on their behalf. Like students, especially at this age, they get lost in the crowd. They get lost in just the sea of people, or maybe in the-.
Speaker 2Can feel isolated and oh yeah, they feel isolated, they feel shame, they feel guilt, they feel unseen, and so they feel so many things, so many emotions, so fast. And so when they're feeling that way, they would love someone to just stick up for them. They love someone to just come in and say, hey, I'm here with you. And so I feel like that word intercede another word they don't know.
Speaker 1They don't understand.
Speaker 2It's like that we don't ever use that word no, no, no, no, not at all. Yeah, no, no, no, no, not at all.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 2But I think it's a word that's so important because they, in learning this word, maybe will realize that like hole that they've been looking for and realize it can only be filled by Jesus, and so saying like I love it. Yeah, like there's been a problem created by sin and Jesus fills it, and so, yeah, you've been feeling this this whole um, and Jesus is the true one that can do this, and already is yeah.
Speaker 1Yeah, that's incredible. All right, um Mal, thanks for sharing. I'm really excited to see all the different. You talked about you and Mikey having different personalities, and I'm excited to see all the expressions of you and how they kind of come out in the mixed programming. It'll be a lot of fun. So, um, that's all we're going to get people for now. You know, we got to just just a taste just a teaser, just a little breadcrumb.
Preparing Students for Summer Programs
Speaker 1Uh, we are going to do the mailbag. Before we do the mail bag, I want to say a thing which I posted on facebook. I don't I love the mail bag. If the mail bag is like if you don't love the mail bag, we don't have to keep doing it. I don't want to beg for questions and I'm not going to beg for questions for the mail bag, but we are kind of getting to the point where it's getting a little bit harder to find questions. So if the mailbag is something that you value, if you're like, yeah, this is a fun part of the episode.
Speaker 1I like asking Mal and Mikey and Lane and Caleb and Corey all these different questions, we need you to send us questions. You can do that at podcast and ciycom. You can do that by text and the link in our show notes you can. Usually I post something on the ci community facebook group and I'm like hey, give me mailbag questions. You can do it there. You know there are ways. So, without further ado, um, like I said in my facebook post, unlike aretha, I am too proud to beg, so I I won't.
Speaker 2I forgot this was recorded and I just gave like I was going, I was like wincing, I was like it's filmed.
Speaker 1It is filmed.
Speaker 2That was really great.
Speaker 4It was very. It was a very heartfelt. It was very heartfelt, I just imagine, like sad music playing underneath it yeah.
Speaker 1Well you're the producerael. Yeah, that's true I know that's exactly what I was thinking of yeah the mailbag is about to be in the arms of the angels I want to say this.
Speaker 2I listen. Listen to the Office Ladies podcast. It is now over Rip. I'm so sad, but I think questions all the time for that, so let me encourage you, brad, with this. I wanted to ask a question about Dinner Party the entire time. Am I emailing them? No, did I email them about nine seasons? No, I'm too lazy.
Speaker 1Well.
Speaker 2So just know that. Thank you. That, even though people aren't submitting questions that they maybe think of questions.
Speaker 1Yeah, but what I'm saying is, we can only answer the questions if they ask for the answers. No, I understand this.
Speaker 2I just wanted to say, if you were feeling that, know that I would love to talk to.
Speaker 1Jenna and Angela, but they're gone.
Speaker 2But I'm always driving and it's dangerous. So maybe they're driving and they're like Brad.
Speaker 4I'm going to email you Faith over feel mount so I think, I think, I think, the, I think, the the an easy way to really sort of distill what we're getting at is, unlike the lord, we cannot answer an unasked question.
Speaker 1Amen so amen um but fortunately we do have some asked questions.
Speaker 4Yes, uh, with that, we have a question from tyler ash. Tyler is asking what's your opinion on boneless wings? Are they chicken nuggets by another name, intended to protect the pride of the orderer, or legitimate food product deserving distinction from the world of children's food?
Speaker 1I take objection.
Speaker 2I know the right answer no, you go. Chicken nuggets aren't children's food? Yes, they are. You don't ever just drive through a McDonald's and order some nugs. No, I do not. That is a garbage, I'm sorry.
Speaker 4I do too, that's a poor man's uh food, that is I will say, I will say in defense of chicken nuggets uh, they are excellent driving food they're great driving food no, an adult chicken nugget is called a chicken strip they're different. They're different items on, like Chick-fil-A's menu.
Speaker 2I know which.
Speaker 4I will say chicken strips at Chick-fil-A are better than chicken nuggets yeah, because they're made for adults?
Speaker 1well, yeah, because the chicken to breading ratio is better that probably is essentially why it's better so why would they make a different product?
Speaker 2it's for the grasping of, like, the hands, like, think of your hand. I think that a chicken strip is for an adult and I think that a nugget is for a child. Now, am I above a nug? No, I'm not, but I'm above a mcdonald's nugget now I'm not. I'm not above mcdonald's nugget now I'm above it when the when daylight is out yeah I'm above it. Now, when the sun comes down and the moon is out, I will eat a mcdonald's nugget it's not my first choice yeah, yeah, but fortunately we're in a season where they're only about six hours of
Speaker 4daylight you're like a a were nugget eater yeah, I'm like awolf. So what is a?
Speaker 2boneless swing. The first thing he said. He said it and it made a million times sense.
Speaker 4Chicken nuggets by another name.
Speaker 2Chicken nuggets by another name.
Speaker 1Meant to protect the dignity of the person ordering them. Yes, I'm fine with that, but I do not feel any loss of dignity ordering chicken nuggets or even like. So like if I go to chili's and I get the whatever they're called boneless wings. No, the chicken crispers. Like the strips. That's fine. Are they strips?
Speaker 2they're strips I don't think it's really any shame. Okay, I never thought about it before, but now that he brings it up I'm like you. You know what. You're right. Can a raccoon, a small baby raccoon that's the size of my niece, hold a nugget so comfortably? Yeah, would a strip be a little too much? Yeah.
Speaker 1I am at a total loss. Tyler Ash, you ruined this podcast.
Speaker 4No, he didn't. Here's what I'll say. I hate messy finger foods. They're among my least favorite things to try and eat. If my fingers get messy eating food, I don't enjoy it.
Speaker 1People eat boneless wings with a fork though that's great.
Speaker 4Well, that's kind of what I'm getting at Like. I actually would prefer to be able to eat wings with a fork if I could, and so getting boneless wings allows me that luxury. Here's the thing. Not all wings places offer the same like flavors for their boneless wings as they do for their bone in wings.
Speaker 4So like hackett's are, you know, yes, a local favorite. Not everyone loves hackett's. Um, some people think hackett's has fallen from grace. I'll stay out of that debate for now. But um, hackett's does not do dry rub on their boneless, I know. But my favorite flavor that they do is their lemon pepper dry rub.
Speaker 1Then order bone-in wings like an adult human being okay, why? Are you all right? Chicken nugget eater goodness gracious so angry I just think boneless wings shouldn't exist, like we didn't. I'm kind of with tyler like the heart of his question, like either order bone-in wings or order chicken nuggets, it's fine.
Speaker 2Wow, see, I didn't take this as any dignity move. I just was saying, yeah, there's a chicken strip.
Speaker 1This is what consumerism does to us.
Speaker 2And there is a chicken nugget.
Speaker 1And there's a boneless wing and there's a bone-in wing. Why do we have so many categories? Do you know how big a chicken is? It's like this big. Why do we need so many? I know how big a chicken is.
Speaker 2I need you to show me how big a chicken is.
Speaker 4Brad just wants us to circle back to the fact that he's killed chickens. I have circle forward, I guess oh, that's true little sneak peek for the listeners and viewers out there okay to next to next to the next episode.
Speaker 2Yeah, give me another question.
Speaker 4I want to move on so we have one more question uh this question comes from kelsey cook uh, and kelsey wants to know what's the best way to prepare students going into this summer's move and mix programs.
Speaker 2We really should have led with Kelsey, because now I am flustered.
Speaker 1Well, we can take move off the table. Let's just talk about mix, flustered about the chicken To prepare.
Speaker 2Don't take them to a chicken place. No, I would say, man, well one thank you. Thank you for bringing your students. We love that we get to. We get to be the bridesmaid, never the bride. That's a big core value here at CIY and that's what I love. That's what I love about coming. This will be my 12th summer with CIY Will be my ninth full time, but when I started emceeing and acting back in 2014, what I loved is I was a camp teamer at, on you know, for Ozark Christian College and I would go around to different camps for two years before I started with CIY and I loved that I could be whatever the camp needed when I was a college rep. So sometimes we showed up and we were cooks and they were like trip. So sometimes we showed up and we were cooks.
Speaker 2And they were like hello, here's a pack of chicken nuggets. And it was like here is like.
Speaker 1And now picked up the chicken nuggets and said these look like boneless wings no, I did not.
Speaker 2I just was like, okay, and you need these when. And I was like, okay, here's the hair nuts, go people. And it was like okay, and you just were what you needed to be. Once I was told we were worship, um, around like for campfire worship once, but my whole team was sick and so I just strummed one chord and said I'm not musical at all. Um, it was terrifying. So you are what you need to be to serve the church, and so I love that. Ozark instilled that in me.
Speaker 2But we were dGroup leaders. We were all these different things to help serve the church. But then, when I came to CIY, I loved that we were doing the same thing, but the difference was we weren't necessarily building the relationships with the students. We still got to eat lunch with the students, we still got to have fun and play, but we went to the next place to set up the next youth ministry. Because when we were showing up to these camps, some of them they didn't have the adult leader support, they didn't have the youth ministry support. And so we were the D group leaders, we were the adults, and so it was so fun to invest in the lives of these students for that week, but it would be hard because the students would try to reach out over Facebook and through the year like they would want you know us to be a part of their lives as college students. But we were across the country, um, so I'd say like the most important part is um preparing your adult leaders, because they are investing in your students and that is just such a cultural and important role that is, you know, going to their soccer games and showing up at their plays. It just that presence means so much and I think that experiencing that for two years and then coming in and getting to have fun and get to share the gospel in so many different ways, I think that's why I, you know, praying that year, I was like Lord, I will do this the rest of my life if you let me and I love that he's let me do that.
Speaker 2The last 12 years is getting to come alongside the church and we know our place isn't to disciple your students. It is to set up great conversations for you to have with your students, to love your students, to have memories with your students, to be present with your students so that you can go home and kick off your ministry and they're not trying to find us on Facebook. We fall to the side. We are a mist of a memory. We're basically just like a color. It was like ah, it was orange.
Speaker 2But all of the memories of camp and of conference and all those things are of God and are of your youth group and your students. Pray over those that will fill your registration spots, but also pray over your leaders. Pray over those who will be discipling your students. Also, pray over those spots that somebody's going to get sick, somebody's going to go out of town and then some parent is going to be like I guess I'll fill it. Those are always the wacky fun, amazing last minute tag-ins that make such a difference. Those parents make such a difference, and so be praying for them now. I would say that's my advice.
Speaker 1I love it. That was beautiful Also. Also, I thought of something else that makes me mad about boneless chicken wings. Okay, I'm being dead serious chicken wings. Let's have a little quiz bone and chicken wings come from what part of the chicken?
Speaker 2I'm gonna say the bones.
Speaker 1I just want to say, michael, bone-in chicken wings come from what part of the chicken? The?
Speaker 4legs? I truly don't know, but I would guess the legs Wrong.
Speaker 1It's the wings. Oh, it is actually the wings. It is actually the wings. Boneless chicken wings come from the wings. Or bone-in chicken wings come from the wings? Oh, it is actually the wing. It is actually the wings. Boneless chicken wings come from the wings. Or bone-in chicken wings come from the wings. Do boneless chicken wings come from the wings? I don't know. No, they don't. They don't brad.
Speaker 1I feel like they don't they just cut a piece of breast meat or thigh meat and they batter and fry it and they say it's a boneless chicken.
Speaker 2I just want to say have you seen miscongeniality?
Speaker 1I have, I love sandy okay.
Speaker 2Well, there's this amazing moment where michael kane michael kane has is so proud of her because she was just on stage and she is talking about gun control and she says this beautiful speech and then, at the very end, she ruins it and he says this brief shining moment and then that mouth I feel like I just answered kelly's question this brief and shiny moment and then you were that mouth that's beyond the event.
Speaker 1Baby, all alright. You ready to go talk to DJ? I would love to. Let's do it, dj. I'm so happy that you're here happy to be here. I love you so much as a person, and that's all I'm going gonna say, because on a prior episode I got in trouble for saying that every guest is one of my favorite people. Apparently I use that verbiage a lot, so I'm not using that verbiage with you, but I want you to know how well do you know? Him pretty well.
Speaker 5I don't know how well you know me now, now that you're not giving me all the love I know.
Speaker 1DJ well enough to know that as a child he was a fan of the Oakland A's.
Speaker 5Oh, dude, okay, that's actually.
Memories of Camp and College
Speaker 1I know DJ well enough to know a lot about DJ. Actually, we went to college together.
Speaker 5We grew up going to camp. There's a whole other podcast for stories of stuff like this.
Speaker 1Yeah, this one's not going to be marked explicit no.
Speaker 2I feel like you could start a synonym for this and you could say he's one of my college favorites.
Speaker 1Yeah, but he's still one of my favorites. Yeah, there you go, college favorites.
Speaker 5But he's still one of my favorites. But we go back.
Speaker 1We go back before college. We went to camp together North.
Speaker 5Florida Christian Service. Camp all day.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 5There's a picture somewhere and it is like there's like all the people we went to college with in it and we were all like sophomores and juniors in high school, which is insane.
Speaker 2Oh, I love a good college and camp throwback.
Speaker 1Yeah, oh yeah so all that to say uh, dj, you're one of my favorite people and I'm just, I'm just leaning in. I can't, I can't even avoid it anymore. So, um, dj, so yeah, you wanted to explain yourself about the a's for a second there.
Speaker 5Well, not actually an A's fan. I wasn't, no, I never was Tampa Bay Rays forever, and the A's hat was the same color as my high school colors. So that was what cool kids did in high school. Was you just wear things because you like the colors or like the way they look? Yeah, and green and yellow was apparently very in D-Land go Bulldogs, D-Land Bulldogs, there's your shout out Tom's.
Speaker 1Pizza. I was just getting ready to say does Tom's Pizza still?
Speaker 5exist, tom's Pizza still exists. It's still closed on weekends, which is dumb If you're ever in D-Land Florida, mal you gotta go. You gotta go to Tom's Pizza. Not many reasons to go to DeLand Florida.
Speaker 1There's one reason.
Speaker 5There's one reason.
Speaker 1And it's Tom's.
Speaker 2Where is it? In the armpit of Florida, there's, it's like.
Speaker 5Dude, the armpit of Florida. North Florida Christian Service Camp is in the armpit of Florida. This is closer to Daytona, if you will.
Speaker 2All right, okay now. Armpit of Florida. This is closer to Daytona. If you will Now, I know it, do you? I'll have to check the armpit later.
Speaker 1The map it's swampy and on a map Let me tell you, north Florida Christian Service Camp, where DJ and I used to hang out together, is like you take the heat and the humidity and the disgustingness of Florida.
Speaker 5It's the hottest place on earth.
Speaker 1But you're not near water. You can't get in the ocean. There's no. There was a pool.
Speaker 4It sounds like Missouri in July.
Speaker 5But you don't go in the lake you don't go in the lake. Oh no because there's gators.
Speaker 1No, it's the amoebas?
Speaker 5Yeah, they'll crawl into all your orifices. That's what they do.
Speaker 1And eat your brain and stuff.
Speaker 5That's what we were told every summer. That's what they told us. I think, they were just scaring us so that we wouldn't get in the lake. It's because they didn't have the staff to run anything at the lake let's be honest.
Speaker 1My word, dj. It's nice to meet you. My name is Mallory Jenkins.
Speaker 5By the way, such an affinity for that place in my heart, mallory, it's nice to meet you as well, you are famous in my youth group because we were at Mix last year and you are from the videos. Oh, my goodness.
Speaker 2That's very funny.
Speaker 5So you're a superstar with a bunch of sixth and seventh graders here in Frederick. Maryland.
Speaker 2Well.
Speaker 5I am honored.
Speaker 2I am honored. That is very sweet. I love that you come to mix now, and it's so funny because it's like you came to mix the year after the last time I was in Pennsylvania and so I didn't get to meet you out there, and so hopefully I'll get to come out to Pennsylvania and meet you soon.
Speaker 1Absolutely, that'd be nice.
Speaker 5Yeah, mix is fun. It's hot. It's really hot because the dorms there don't have AC, but everything else is amazing.
Speaker 2It's the same way up in the pacific northwest. They really yes, they're like we don't need ac and it's like you do year round oh yeah I had, like I got like heat exhaustion up there in 2019 where I slept in the car, like in the rental car because, the windows down because it was just a center block building and on the side that with the one window in my room did not get the wind.
Speaker 2And so it was 96 degrees inside at night and it was so hot and we went to like Dairy Queen, to like cheer up the gang. I was like, okay, guys, we're going to. Dairy Queen. And then they were like, yeah, we can do any food, but our ice cream machines are down. And I was like one would say this is what you're known for.
Speaker 5One would say this was your core. When did Dairy Queen become McDonald's?
Speaker 2yeah, they were like yeah, they just can't keep up with the weather like this just two weeks I was like yeah, neither can I. So like yeah, you need to adapt for these two weeks, and so it's very funny that, like the coast, the like north coast, schools are like, yeah, we just really grin and bear it. But hey, schools, or like you know events, like us they're like you can totally rent our facilities.
Speaker 1We would love to sign a contract with you, please and we're like all of this to say we're very happy with our relationship with juniata. Oh, we are, and we would love to continue to partner with them in the future Best food at a CIY bin period? It's not even close.
Speaker 5Best food, Best cafeteria, best food Sonia the lady that takes you in.
Speaker 2Oh my gosh, she is heaven sent. I was trying to return some keys or something to some youth ministers and I kept on going through their like little roundabout, like cafeteria thing, and she was like trying not to count me when I would go in and like, oh well, somebody left a water bottle, somebody did this, and I was going to like give them different things, different youth ministers, and finally she like gave me like a dessert when I came in the next time and I was like she was like honey.
Speaker 3You need to eat, and I mean what school has a hibachi?
Speaker 2You know?
Speaker 5Bro hibachi taco bar, like everything.
Speaker 2Ice cream counter. I mean, it's amazing. I love Juniata.
Speaker 1Anyway, we're not here to talk about Sonia. We're here to talk about. Collective Church, dj's church, collective Church and how they are absolutely blowing up. Hey, dj, when did you start there?
Speaker 5So I mean, I'll just give you the long short story. So the church started, got planted officially in 2017. Me and my wife, kaylee, we moved up here in 2017 to be a part of the launch team to help everything, and I just started well, just started on set. I'm on staff now for two and a half years as the groups and youth director.
Speaker 1Right. So for most for the, for like the first part of of that time, you were likeivocational and did the whole thing and were helping out.
Speaker 5Oh yeah, I sold cars, I worked at Chick-fil-A, I did all the things, all the things Helping out here, and now you just get to be a full-time youth pastor.
Speaker 1These are some crazy numbers I'm going to throw at you. Mal you ready for this?
Speaker 2Do you want?
Speaker 1to do move or mix first.
Speaker 2I lost you at numbers.
Speaker 1We'll do mix first, okay DJ came to mix for the first time in 2023 with Collective Church, brought 15 people. 2024 brought 24 people. This year registered to bring 31 people Group just keeps growing. That's awesome. Move numbers are insane.
Speaker 5Yeah, well, he doubled mix. I might have to get weightless move 2022.
Speaker 1Move brought four people four.
Speaker 22020 sorry, 2022, we're great brought four 23 let me say, before you tell me, he doubled his mix, so he went from 15 to this year he's going to bring 30. Over the course of three years. Yes, my expectation is he is going to bring eight.
Speaker 1He brought eight in 2023. The next year, he doubled. Okay, and then he, more than doubled again in 2024 and brought 18. And this year, if he adds one more spot DJ you got to add one more spot, bro He'll double again. He's currently registered to bring 35 people to Johnson University of Tennessee.
Speaker 5Congratulations on being part of a healthy growing church.
Speaker 1It's so amazing and I'm sure just like a fun ride to be along for, if I'm guessing.
Speaker 5It's absolutely incredible. Our students are insane Like they. So what is crazy is being in this area and the reason this church got planted in this area in Frederick, Maryland, is this county and the last census before that, when they were trying to pick an area over, it was a I don't know the percentage exactly, but it was an overwhelming percentage of people in this county checked. Either they're not affiliated with religion or they're just not religious at all. So like right, right for the harvest, like this area needed something. There's churches here that are just kind of like doing their own thing. They're not really reaching these people. So our goal is really just to like do the opposite of everything everyone else in the area does and just go for it a little bit.
Speaker 5Before I got the position for youth ministry, we had a good team of people and I was one of these people that would step in help with youth in our free time and kind of have some stuff going on. Um, and these kids, man, they have really like leaned in hard like our kids right now they're like in that junior senior stage have been here and seen like this full development and full arc and they are leading like the charge. They are the ones like promoting ciy to the max, like telling sixth and seventh graders like yo, you need to go sign up for this thing because it will impact your life. Like it, our students have really like grasp onto the culture of the things we do and it's been, it's been rapid fire, it's been insane to keep up with.
Transitioning Roles in Youth Ministry
Speaker 1Yeah, I bet it has Um. So we want to talk specifically about how, like I think, the role of youth pastor changes a little bit as groups grow Like when you're bringing four kids to move? I'm guessing. If I remember correctly, we talked about this you did not bring any females with you. No, you were the only leader and it was just like you and three kids piled in a minivan.
Speaker 5I mean kind of it was me and two students and then one of the students dad yeah, okay that was awesome.
Speaker 1So much fun, but like that is a different job than bringing 35 people to move oh, it's like totally different like approach and I think for a lot of youth pastors there's some almost like sadness as you step out of that world where it's like, oh, I can be you know kind of small group leader and youth pastor and all of these things to all of these kids. And as you kind of move into this world where you're a little bit more of a manager, you're trying to like put all the pieces in place, make sure that everything happens well. So, um, how, how? I'm just curious how that's been. Like, do you look back on the times when you had two kids and a dad going to move fondly or like, do you miss that?
Speaker 5I mean there's, there's always elements like I miss of those things, but like also at the same time, like right, this is the dream. I mean, brad, you, you know this because, uh, we went to college together and grew up with each other. But, like you know, when you talk about like having a youth ministry and being invested in students' lives and doing these things, like these kind of momentum things and these growing things, are all the things you like kind of picture in your head and daydream about as you're like getting prepared to go in. I mean we can skip the whole part where, like oh, where's the ministry jobs? How do you get into one? Is anyone going to give me a shot? Like you can skip that whole part, but like you always like a dream about it and what it would look like and for to be in it. Like, yeah, you look back like fondly at those times because it was hard work put into. Like what you're in now and you still find yourself like still daydreaming is like crazy. Like what we're at now, um, we average about 50 students like on a Wednesday night at our weekly programming and we're like bro, like that's, that's what we got rolling right now. Like what does this look like in a year from now?
Speaker 5It's just like dreaming and picturing that up, where you talk about stepping out of it, being the one that does everything, being the youth pastor. You're the small group leader, you're the one the kids touch base with, you're the one the parents reach out to and all of those things. There is a strong point and I am, and all of those things. There is a strong point and we, we, I am feeling all of the. It's very relevant because we're feeling all the weight of all of these is you've got to delegate, you've got to build a good team, you've got to invest in people, because you can not carry it all on your own.
Speaker 5And what's hard about that is because when you're like a youth group of like I don't know, I don't know 15, 20 kids like you're, you're getting solid time and like there's awesome kingdom work being invested in those 15, 20 students.
Speaker 5But at the same time, like you know, the impact is bigger and you know you want to be able to reach more kids and you know how important this is for more kids, but at the same time, it's like I wouldn't say it's easier then because you're still doing all the things. But at the same time, like you, the warm and fuzzies because you're holding, you're having the small group conversations, you're the one having these baptism conversations with students, and now it's like, hey, I'm training, now I have to minister to adults, to do like a portion of what I do, right, like, and that's hard because a part of that is like letting go. And it's hard to let go because when, especially when you're passionate about ministering to students and you're trying to figure out now, it's like oh wait, a whole section of this is actually ministering to adults, to minister to students and that's how you get like greater, bigger impact on. That's something like we've been working through a lot. Right now I do a coaching with Ryan Arnold at Community Christian Church in White Marsh, I love.
Speaker 5Ryan Arnold. Ryan Arnold is dude. He's like a youth ministry guru, yeah, uh, he's insane, yeah, and I get a cool opportunity to talk with him like a biweekly, weekly and we just kind of I just pick from him. Honestly, like I, I have to continue to take in more resources and take in more stuff to learn what. What do we even do? What do I do from here, right?
Speaker 1So it's like everybody gets into youth ministry cause they're like, well, I can get paid to play putt puck golf on a Thursday afternoon with a bunch of ninth graders. It's like, yeah, I'll do that as my job, you know. But then it very quickly becomes something like way different. What are the um what? What are? What are you discovering? Do you care to be a little vulnerable? Care to peel back some layers. What are you?
Speaker 1discovering are like uh, things that maybe you're not as polished at that it's like oh man, I got a. I didn't realize that I was going to have to be good at this, but I got to get good at this.
Animal Personalities in Youth Ministry
Speaker 5Yo organization, uh, just in in general, like, uh, I don't know that I was going to have to be good at this, but I got to get good at this. Yo organization, just in general. I don't know how many youth ministers say that, because it's just the typical otter personality that we get boxed into. But, dude, organizationally it makes sense up here, did you?
Speaker 1just say, otter personality, yeah.
Speaker 5Oh yeah, Otters the animal personality, the animal.
Speaker 2You know, otters the animal personality, the animal.
Speaker 5You know, otters they like floating their backs.
Speaker 2Yeah, yeah, golden retriever, otter, lion, and what's the other one? What?
Speaker 1Eagle.
Speaker 5Is this like a?
Speaker 1personality thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So wait, you can either be a golden retriever, an otter, yeah so wait, you can either be a golden retriever, an otter, yeah, a lion.
Speaker 2A lion, so a lion would be like a red. Okay, a golden retriever is like a, like a. Royal no, they're blue.
Speaker 1They've got to be blue. Yeah, yeah, right, they're like a blue.
Speaker 2And then an otter is a yellow.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 2And then a white Is an eagle yellow.
Speaker 1Yeah, and then a white is an eagle. I just made that up it might be a beaver.
Speaker 2It's a beaver. Yeah. Why'd they choose such weird animals? No, because a beaver builds.
Speaker 1I feel like I'm a beaver you're a beaver, I'm, so on the color code, I have two like I'm a red blue, which is a weird combination, but you can't be two different animals here's the deal.
Speaker 2I've been them all. Sure you can as I've. As I've grown, I feel like I was in college. I was an otter, I was a yellow, I was like, oh yeah, well, at least. In high school I was like I'm all over the place. The back of my car looks like I live in it. I am just having so much fun. And then I was like, oh, oh, guess what If I clean the back of my car? People fit in it. So I want more people around.
Speaker 1So then you were a golden retriever. So then I was a golden retriever. I was more like relational emotional I've never heard of any of this in my entire life people come to places and spaces where people are more invited.
Speaker 2And then it was like oh, getting in the work space, it was like, okay, I need to be more organized and we need to like figure things out and leadership. Okay, I need to like kind of work on that side of me with like the lion, but then at the end of the day, I'm a beaver, like I really want everybody to laugh and have fun, but I'm not spontaneous. Okay, I'm funny, I'm not fun. I want to make plans with you, but not right now, I know it's like we can have fun at a very specific designated time.
Speaker 2I got home, I parked my pants at the door. I'm watching TV and eating soup. No, I did and I know. And so it's like, yeah, I'm a beaver. I'm never. I've definitely heard the rest of them.
Speaker 5I want to get back to the rest of them.
Speaker 4I want to get back to DJ golden retriever, though Just to answer the question.
Speaker 1Very happy with that, thank you.
Speaker 5Bro Brad had lion moments in college, though Just to give you like he, he was lying in college.
Speaker 1I'm so confused.
Speaker 5Okay, anyway, you were saying typical.
Speaker 1So youth pastors stereotypically are otters they're yellows, they're sevens they want to be out there having fun look at you, a neogram yeah, so.
Speaker 5I interrupted you, I'm sorry.
Speaker 1I took that train and I steered it right off the tracks that's what a podcast is all about.
Speaker 5That's every successful podcast. I took that train and I steered it right off the tracks.
Speaker 2That's what a podcast is all about. Is it that's? Every successful podcast goes off the tracks.
Speaker 1I'm not sure that he should be explaining what a podcast is to you, Brad. I have said many times that I have no idea what I'm doing. That's the best and that's fine with me.
Speaker 5So anyway, DJ, you were saying Otter, otter, we're organizationally dysfunctional to a degree, I would say.
Speaker 1Youth ministers like Did you know that otters hold hands when they sleep, so they don't float away from each other?
Speaker 2Yeah, do they really yeah? And they take little stones.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 2And they hold little stones.
Speaker 5They like crack stuff. They blow on their back and like crack open the oysters.
Speaker 1Otters are wild dude. They're so cute.
Speaker 5They're wild. Okay, Also didn't know they were a predator until Zootopia.
Speaker 1Yeah, never seen it.
Speaker 5I thought they were prey.
Speaker 2I wouldn't have thought oh my gosh.
Speaker 5Watch Zootopia, you'll learn a thing about.
Speaker 1Okay, watch Zootopia, you'll learn a thing about culture. Okay, so you're pastors or otters and you had to learn organizational skills.
Building a Strong Youth Ministry
Speaker 5Organizational skills. You know details like emails and emails and emails and responding and communication. Like I am I mean just point blank Like I know what my strengths are. Like I know I am a person where I am really great relationally. If someone is in the room, I am great at being with groups of students and getting them on board to do things. I'm great with, like, being in.
Speaker 5When we get to the event or we get to the things, I'm fully present, I'm in there and I'm cooking, right, like. But when it comes to lead up to things and planning things and putting things out there, I fall short like pretty big time and those are things like I need help. I can come up with ideas, I can come up with good ideas, but my follow through because of my hard to communicate what is going on in here to other people, it falls through a lot of times. So I very much have people that I'm surround myself with in that I continue to surround myself with, that understand what DJ language is in a way, so we're able to what does that look like in youth ministry?
Speaker 5specifically Like what people people um, um, yeah, you're like surrounding yourself with people, you know what I mean. Like for people for me that like surround myself, like for me personally, I surround myself with, like some of my best friends that are high level leadership here at collective, and I I always basically boldly ask all of them to be a part of my team because, like I'm going to stack this thing up like fancy football, I'm going to draft the best possible team I can so I can win as many games and win championships.
Speaker 1And so I tried to fantasy football championships to be on DJ.
Speaker 5Well, in the collective I won in 2020. So okay. I'm doing pretty good this year, but I want to start. Thanks. We actually have two leagues and I got relegated so I'm in a bottom league. So I'm trying to get out of that league this year, but I'm doing good.
Speaker 1As long as you're the best of the worst then, you'll get back to where you were meant to be Be the best of the worst, yeah.
Speaker 5So I surround myself with these people that like understand me relationally and like they're kind of probably in my smaller circle, in my crew, and they help kind of put me on the path and Help point me like in things that I need to do a little bit better. When it comes to my team and my small, small group leaders, I Mean right now, like be honest, we grew faster like I kid wise, student wise than we did as a team wise and like that happens, and we're in like the growing pains of a lot of that. So we're in the process of really like recruiting and growing our team right now, so so we can like manage all of these students Great problem to have, but at the same time it can be absolute chaos.
Speaker 2So yeah, what was the thing that kind of kick-started that growth, like going from you know a handful of students to 50 on a week basis?
Speaker 5Yeah, I would say one thing it's one of our values here is faith. That's bold, and one of the big things we're always going to do is we're going to do bold things. I'll test back to when we were registering just to bring on this CIY podcast. So let's talk about CIY for a second. Like we'll go back to CIY going into last year when we were talking about registrations and looking at what the youth group was at.
Speaker 5I had a meeting. I was talking with my friend, boss and head pastor and we were talking and essentially like we're sitting there. He's like, well, what do you think is going to happen? I was like I mean, we can play it safe and get this amount of registrations right now, but I think we need to just go for it and just see what happens. And you know that comes with like us also like working things out. Like other churches have different funds, we got to do things a little bit differently. Sometimes you got to be a little creative, but it's a it's a bold, it's a bold move. So we shout out and we got more registrations and then we thought probably would be safe for us and it panned out and we end up bringing, you know 15 students, three or three adults last year to move and we end up bringing 20 students to mix.
Speaker 5Last year, it's, it's. You know, coming up with this idea of an event is like, hey, man, like I I don't know where, where we sit right now because we're rapidly growing but like, let's do it, like, throw as much stuff against the wall and see what sticks right now. And you know, if we build it out, if we work really hard on this, set it up the way it's supposed to be, students will come, things will go well, like right. And if it doesn't, these kids barely know what youth group's supposed to look like anyways, because they're in such an unchurched area Like they don't know what youth group's supposed to be, they're going to have fun. What we think is what we strive for is perfection and all of these other things, and the reality is is like, yeah, I still strive to do the best you can do, but with we're leaving on a Wednesday night thinking, ah man, that was like mid right, like that wasn't that great, like these students, it's the best night of, and I can't argue with that. So we're going to continue to do bold things, we're going to continue to set the bar high and see what happens and you know, if it completely was terrible, we'll just scratch it again. They don't know.
Speaker 5But at the same time it's like these students need you to keep picking up things. And Ryan Arnold not to mention him again, but I talk to him a lot he said there's two things that every youth ministry should be putting into place and as long as you have these two things, you're going to be just fine and you can try as many things you are. And number one is like strong biblical teaching which, like I, a hundred percent stand by. What we teach every single week and we actually with our small group material and our Wednesday night material, it's intentionally the same as what is going on on Sunday mornings with the adults. And we do this so the students', parents and them can be actively having the same conversations throughout the week and some topics right, we're in a giving series. So we'll mix it up a little bit more and like we'll take different acts, like you know, go at it from a different angle, but ultimately it's students and parents and adults are all being fed kind of like the same thing as a whole church.
Speaker 5So strong biblical teaching is like number one for us and number two is having adults that genuinely care about students like having like their small group leaders, like are in their lives. These are people when like stuff is not going well, they are reaching out to and we're seeing that actively and I I owe that to our leaders for actually like being present in the room in small groups and being vulnerable. We talk about leaders go first. A lot, like I'd say for me, anytime I'm speaking to students or anytime one of our leaders are speaking to students, we're very open, honest and real about what we're going through in our life right now and what we went through in our life then. Because I mean, I've been around so many adults like when I was and this is not like slamming, like any of the things I was a part of but I've been around adults in my childhood that were so fake and meanwhile they're doing this one thing and leading you one way, but yet like they don't put any of this stuff into practice in their lives and they're not honest about like hey, you know what, like I'm struggling, like you know what. Why are we holding that back? Like we need to be. I mean, I'm not going to sit here and, like you know, say explicit things to students, of course, but I'm going to be open, honest about them when I'm struggling with my mental health and self-doubt and things like that, like I know they all are.
Emotional Intelligence in Youth Ministry
Speaker 5It's 2024. Kids' minds are like splattered across the wall right now and the more open to us we are real about what we're going on, it's going on in our lives, like that's just reciprocated. Kids grasp to that, like they don't want you to sit here and talk about things that don't like, not to say they don't matter. But there's no point in sitting here talking about things just to talk about things. Talk about how it's actively playing an impact in your life. Talk about what you're struggling with. Talk about how this impacts you. And we've seen, because of that, vulnerability in that step and I hold our small group leaders to a pretty high standard when it comes to that and they do a great job. Our church is pretty cutthroat as it begins in that level, so they kind of are used to it. But, man, our leaders do such a phenomenal job at setting that bar when we go into small group and creating that space.
Speaker 5We do something that's called Sashay Emotions with every single small group we do here at Collective and this comes from a retreat, and Sashay stands for sad, angry, scared, happy, excited, tender. And we put these emotions on the floor every time we go in and each student, even if it's your first time, we have them. Them check in and you can be a surface or as deep as you want and it's your time to share exactly how you're feeling with everything like at this moment and just giving them these simple core emotions to work through. It's just. We just continue to provide them with helpful tools. So I word vomit so much. I don't even know if I answered a question. You didn't. I'm sorry, I word vomit so much.
Speaker 5I don't even know if I answered a question.
Speaker 1You didn't.
Speaker 5I'm like a politician man, I'm all over the place.
Speaker 2No, you just took me to emotions.
Speaker 1I was like man, yeah, the whole time I was sitting there thinking like, oh my gosh, my biggest thing is I lead a group of eighth grade guys right now.
Speaker 4Best.
Speaker 2I like eighth grade. I have fifth grade, girls and man. I can't imagine. They would sashay to an emotion. They'd be like Fosse. Fosse, Fosse, Fosse.
Speaker 1They would.
Speaker 2It would be amazing.
Speaker 1So I lead a group with another guy and we like the big battle that I feel like we're fighting right now is how do we help our students be, like, more emotionally intelligent, like they never talk about how they feel? So we resorted to, just like the classic happies and crappies. So every time we met with our D group, we do happies and crappies. So every time we met with our d group, we do happies and crappies, but they're always like my crappy is the chief's lost and I'm like but like the, the sachet thing, like that could I'm? I'm sitting here thinking, boy, that could be an angle that might actually really really help us out. So so, anyway, thanks for that. Yeah, man.
Speaker 5No, no, dude, of course, like I. I mean we use it in our men's groups, we use it in our women's groups, like it's, it's been kind of put into the culture and the way we do groups, like as a whole, like it gives you a, it makes you think for a second. I mean, like you'd be like oh, I'm excited because, like right, like you said, the chiefs. I'm excited Cause, like the chiefs games this weekend, like yeah, you could say that, but like, and the levels up there for students to go as deep as shallow as they want, but like then you get to the student, that's just like, hey, my, my parents like just don't get along, like they're divorced. And I'm going back and forth, I'm just exhausted. Like the floor is open and the more you do it like the repetition, whatever it looks like. I think there's another one called a high, low Buffalo that our church resident does with his family, and it's just like one high thing from the week, one low thing and one random one. I'm like, oh, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2I think we did that with art. Why did you say now Just Buffalo, Buffalo, Buffalo. Oh yeah with art. Why did you say mouth just buffalo, buffalo, buffalo. Oh yeah, yeah, they would, they would. Oh, my mind like my eyes. If it looks like I'm zoning out because now we record this podcast, it's because, when you said fantasy football.
Speaker 2I heard fancy football and I just thought of all of you still having like, even though youth ministers don't wear cargo shorts anymore. It's like you have more like shorts on, but nice little jackets. When you picked your roster Like that's what my brain does Anything that is said that I hear and then my eyes just go. Oh, you said DJ language and so I said dirty bit boom, boom, boom, boom, like the Black Eyed Peas, and they're like I'm head of the demo, like that's what.
Speaker 1I was like so, that's Miles Buffalo for the podcast. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's like that's my brain.
Speaker 2Is that you were like I? Need somebody to speak yeah, dj language language. And then he was like yeah, ministry language. I was like oh, I went a different way and I was like black eyed and so like yeah, that's my brain, is that it codes like a little wheel and it goes this is from this, from this mind, understand everything.
Speaker 5I 100% understand everything you said, though Like I get it Because I am.
Speaker 2I am a middle schooler, I am a sixth grader that writes for sixth graders, Like that's the thing. I'm like fancy football For sure. Got it. Okay.
Speaker 2Like there is a part of me. We were unpacking our cases and I was talking to somebody who was it and like our cases. And I was talking to somebody who was it and like I, I went home and I couldn't sleep because someone was like, ah, pro wrestling. And I was like we didn't write a sketch that was pro wrestling, like wrestlers, like people trying to wrestle, not sleeping. Like I didn't write an ad about someone trying to get to sleep and trying to rest for rest of your life, are you kidding me? It was like are you trying to get to sleep tonight? And then it was like two luchadors come in and try to wrestle you to sleep are you kidding me? And like I'm like, well, burn it to the ground you know I have one programming rule.
Speaker 1I'm not a programmer, but my one rule of programming is you can never have enough luchadors.
Speaker 2I know so I like I'm telling you I didn't get over it for like a week I was like wrestler commercial. You missed it like I'm.
Speaker 1I'm not over it still anyway, yeah, if you need to keep processing, you can.
Speaker 2I'm gonna move on, but feel free to circle back if you need to my the inner machinations of my mind are an enigma, they indeed are like patrick star
Youth Ministry Growth and Vision
Speaker 1um, all right, so youth group is kind of small and it's like you feel like your role is really pastored all of those people You're a relational guy. Um, now, based on where this conversation has gone, I feel like you're kind of describing your role as like dreamer, like where, what's you know? What can we do? What's going to work, what's not going to work? What let's you you I think you use the expression like throwing stuff at the wall and seeing what sticks. Um, what, what do you think is next? Like, if you continue to grow, what's next for for you, you know?
Speaker 2Yeah, yeah, let's see, I'm just kidding, no, you also can have that, because also that's a lot of pressure, because he's like I'm trying to keep up friends man I love dj so much, I'm just gonna I do love you so much, I know, I know dude, uh, actually, when mal, when mal was talking about the fancy football and she was talking about guys wearing shorts and blazers.
Speaker 1I was like I think I've seen a picture of DJ in like hot pink Chino shorts and a blazer.
Speaker 5Really.
Speaker 1Is that a? Thing?
Speaker 5Maybe I don't know, bro. Yeah, it doesn't sound wrong, I mean you can go deep on the Facebook hole if you want to Might have to do that, anyway, am. I allowed to ask questions on this podcast.
Speaker 1or am I not Mal? No, you are, I don't know.
Speaker 2I just didn't want to put pressure.
Speaker 1He's doing such a good job now. Dj what question do you want me to ask you?
Speaker 5No, you're good, I'll answer the question, you're fine. So I would say this is something like, hey, let's go write vulnerability to the max, let's keep going. I would say, actually, this summer, like as great as a summer as it was for Youth Collective, ciy, like even coming back, like I would point to our high schoolers, like specifically our high schoolers, like they're running right now, um, we've baptized three students from ci, like that went on ci trips this summer, uh, from move specifically, and we have another one that's on the way and they are all they're supportive each other's great. Um, the rest of the students that are coming in and like joining this, like are seeing this and they're like attracted to it and like really just joining into the whole thing. So it like what could be click and like grouped off, like is not feeling that way at all, which is really great. Um, but you know all these great things happening for me personally, right, like it, you get, you grow, you grow so fast. You find yourself just caught in the do, do, do, do, do cycle. You're like, oh man, things are going, I've got to juggle all these things and you find yourself lacking vision and becoming a manager of a ministry, and I'd say that's something that came hardcore for me, especially as we got out of the summer, recognized it, aware of it, had conversations had to come up with and, like right now we're in the process of building out, like in actually getting more focused on the vision.
Speaker 5We have a big thing that we we use for leadership and it's the three C's, which is care, clarity and challenge. Three C's, which is care, clarity and challenge, um, and it's like a Venn diagram with like a triangle Venn diagram and you can fall anywhere, like like people filled this out for you essentially and you're trying to, as a leader, meet them at what would be a seven, which is like the center, which would be at the center. Um, and, as I found out, I'm really good at care. Um, I'm terrible at challenging people and I lack giving people clarity. So it was, it was kind of an eyeopening moment for me to where I was like, oh man, if we're going to lead this thing on, like first off, I always feel bad challenging volunteers because, like, right, they're given their time to be here, like I want to give them things to do, I want them to be a part of this, but at the same time, like the end of the day, like it's not their job, like, and that's a headspace. I got to get myself out and be like hey, they didn't say no, they're here to do this. Like we're all in this together, um.
Speaker 5But at the same time too, when you're managing, you are not providing true clarity of what this is working towards. So, at the same time, like it could just feel like, are we just like a school right? Like, is this just middle school or high school as they graduate out? And then what like? What are? What are we building towards? What are we going towards?
Speaker 5So right now, I'm working on clarity for what our youth group looks like on a, you know, 12 month span of what our years look like as we continue to grow. I mean, the dream man is really that. I mean we are so big and like students are like really coming here, like, and that we're able to. Right now we're going to, we're actually looking into we didn't start rhythms yet, but we're actually going to be doing rhythms in January with select students that are kind of taking that next step in the level up, starting multiple ministries that come off of the youth ministry whole, like so we have like our program. We have our small groups, we're recruiting people, we're doing all the right things. We're building this thing up, but at the same time there's got to be other small avenues for students to come in and be a part of things. There's got to be, there's got to be more on ramps. There's got to be some events where we're doing this fun thing here or there like a big bring your friends out kind of thing, where we're creating the momentum of more people to be here.
Speaker 5And the reason ultimately right more people are coming here is so these students can know who Jesus is, learn what it's like to follow him, and then apply that to their life, because there's no better time than now in their lives, rather than being 28, 32, being like, oh, now I have to like install these disciplines into my already developed brain in the way I do things. Bro, if they can do this, like that's the thing we talked about mental health with. And I was like, hey, you guys' brains are just still being developed. Like I don't mean anything by that, but like you know, if you guys make these habits now, like when you're my age, you won't, you won't be, you'll still struggle, right, like storms are coming Like there's no dodge in that it's going to be terrible, but at the same time, like you will have these rooted inside of you through all of this. So like that's that's kind of the clarity point is always pointing back to those things when we come to it. But at the same time, right like I don't have all the answers.
Speaker 5I'm not, Mr like perfect youth minister. I was a black sheep at most through most of my ministry-esque findings and through college. But you know what, like, we're figuring it out, we're gonna push through and we're gonna continue to grow and I think a lot of that right Like clarity is attested. Like the things that we actively do do now it's just taking refining those and continuing to simplify as we move forward. Like I think simplifying is a big thing. We talk like my pastor brings this up all the time Like Apple at one point had like all these different projects and then Steve jobs came in and cut it down to like five and then now they're. What does anyone have an android? Like, if someone has a green text, you are not friends with them.
Speaker 1No, so, yeah, no like so ryan arnold has an android yeah, dude, he does, and it's frustrating.
Speaker 5It's really frustrating. He keeps claiming he's getting an iPhone soon too.
Speaker 1I'll believe it when I see it, anyway, wow.
Speaker 2Everybody on an Android just clicked out of this podcast, yeah.
Speaker 1They feel my lines.
Speaker 5So when we talk, about managing a growing youth group. I guess the thing is, I'm not saying you grind through it, but at the same is, like you, you just you put like I'm not saying you grind through it, but at the same time, man, you gotta, you gotta put your head to it and rely on people, rely on people around you, and you gotta stick to the things that matter the most and like simplify those as much as you can, and when those things are crystal clear, other things will happen.
Speaker 1Yeah, it's good, it's good stuff. And uh, a good, a good note to end on? I think so. Um, dj, as much as it pains me, pains pains me, because I just love looking at your beautiful face. Um, I think we need to let you go, you know, but you've given us lots to chew on. And um, congratulations on your ministry thriving and growing and um, all the good things that you guys are doing out there in Frederick, and, uh, we'll be praying that that the Lord continues to bless you and your ministry.
Speaker 5Thanks Brad, thanks Mallory.
Speaker 2Absolutely. It's so nice to meet you.
Blessing and Future Plans
Speaker 1I love DJ. I love that conversation Real quick. My favorite thing that he said that we didn't really get to elaborate on a lot, but that I think is just gold was when he was talking about how, as our youth ministry grows, a lot of times we're just like fighting to keep our head above water and when that happens, you tend to like put as many things on cruise control as you possibly can, just so that you can feel like you've kind of like got everything under control. But positioning yourself and positioning your role and bringing people in from around you so that you can continue to dream and continue to build for whatever's next and not just manage, is just a really important piece of that puzzle and I'm grateful that you brought that up. So, anyway, I would love to finish up our time together, mal, if you wouldn't mind, by reading our blessing over our listeners.
Speaker 2I would love to Thanks I would love to. May God show you grace and bless you. May he make his face shine on you. May you experience the love of Christ, through whom God gives you fullness of life. May you be strengthened by his power. May Christ himself make his home in your heart, that you would be full of his love and grace and that those you serve would see Jesus in you thank you to my buddy, dj, for being here.
Speaker 1Thanks Mal for being here. It was a great conversation. Excited to circle back up again in two weeks and have a conversation with Becca Binky about creating a welcoming environment in our student ministries for students with disabilities. So that's going to be a great conversation. In the meantime, you can feel free to reach out to us on the CYY community Facebook group or by email at podcast at CYcom. See you next time, thank you.